“For in grief nothing "stays put." One keeps on emerging from a phase, but it always recurs. Round and round. Everything repeats. Am I going in circles, or dare I hope I am on a spiral?But if a spiral, am I going up or down it?How often -- will it be for always? -- how often will the vast emptiness astonish me like a complete novelty and make me say, "I never realized my loss till this moment"? The same leg is cut off time after time.”
— C.S. Lewis
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If you've ever felt like your healing journey is moving in circles rather than a straight line, please know that you are not alone. C.S. Lewis beautifully articulated this struggle: "For in grief nothing 'stays put.' One keeps on emerging from a phase, but it always recurs. Round and round. Everything repeats. Am I going in circles, or dare I hope I am on a spiral? But if a spiral, am I going up or down it? How often -- will it be for always? -- how often will the vast emptiness astonish me like a complete novelty and make me say, 'I never realized my loss till this moment'? The same leg is cut off time after time." Healing is never linear, and returning to your grief only means you are processing it with a deeper level of strength. How do you navigate the unpredictable waves of life's transitions? Share your thoughts below so we can support one another.
About this quote
Grief is rarely a straight road with a clear finish line; instead, it is a landscape we must traverse repeatedly, often feeling lost in its familiarity. When we experience deep loss, we expect healing to be a progressive journey of feeling better day by day. Yet, as C.S. Lewis so rawly captures, grief has a cyclical nature that can feel incredibly disorienting. Just when we think we have finally stepped out of the shadows, a wave of remembrance crashes over us, making the loss feel as astonishingly painful and brand new as it did on day one. But there is profound comfort and life advice hidden within this dizzying loop: you are not going in circles, you are on a spiral. Re-experiencing your pain is not a sign of failure or regression; it is a natural part of processing love and loss at deeper levels. The key to navigating this emotional journey is to offer yourself radical grace. Do not measure your recovery by the absence of sadness, but by your courage to face each turn of the spiral, knowing that every rotation brings you closer to integration, strength, and quiet peace.
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