14 beautiful quotes by Groucho Marx. Click any quote to view, download and share it as an image.
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Groucho Marx
“Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.”
“Humor is reason gone mad.”
“Well, art is art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water! And east is east and west is west and if you take...
“I think women are sexy when they got some clothes on. And if later they take them off then you've triumphed.Somebody on...
“I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.”
“The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made.”
“Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wi...
“A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.”
“When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying...
“I sent the club a wire stating, PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON'T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT ME AS...
“Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.”
“From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it....
“I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tom...
“A child of five could understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.”